As Remembrance Sunday draws near, it’s a time of year that brings pause, reflection, and gratitude for the sacrifices made by our military families. This year, I'm reminded of the stories that define military life, particularly from those who have been part of it for decades. I recently had the chance to sit down with my mother-in-law, Carole, a Royal Navy wife for six years, and to reflect on her journey through the challenges, triumphs, and unique bond shared among military wives.
In the early 80s, Carole married Phil, a young man just beginning his Navy career. Their life together was quickly shaped by moves across the UK, from Camborne to Portsmouth, and then Plymouth, with deployments layered on top of raising a family. As many of us know, military life comes with sudden transitions and adjustments, and for Carole, it also meant Phil’s deployment to one of the most intense conflicts of the era—the Falklands War.
When “Military Family” Becomes Your Identity
Carole shared how, in those days, military families had no mobile phones, no FaceTime, and certainly no regular calls from their loved ones overseas. Communication was sparse, often limited to a few telegrams. For four long months, she waited for word from Phil, juggling the daily care of two young children. Her youngest was only six weeks old when Phil shipped out.
“There were no tablets or phones, so news was filtered through the wife of a senior officer who’d get updates from the ship. She’d pass them down the line, but it wasn’t a conversation—it was just the basic facts,” Carole recalled. Imagine waiting days, sometimes even weeks, just to learn if your spouse was safe.
The loneliness was real, and so was the strength required to get through it. And in some ways, it’s something many military spouses today can still relate to, especially during Christmas deployments or other times when family togetherness seems out of reach. Those of us in the military community have each other, but the quiet of an empty house in the evening can be hard, even in a time of constant connectivity.
The Bond Among Military Wives
One thing that stood out from Carole’s story was the remarkable support system that military wives built among themselves. “We took turns staying over with each other or calling when we were feeling a bit down,” Carole explained. She had neighbours on the same street, each a military wife with young children, all there to lean on one another. They looked after each other’s kids, shared meals, and even took turns staying at each other’s homes to ease the nights alone.
Today, while we have more ways to stay connected with our loved ones during deployments, the bond among military wives is as strong as ever. Whether it’s through support groups, social media, or local meetups, we know the importance of having each other’s backs. Military life is full of change, and finding friends who understand that is invaluable.
Military Gifts and Small Gestures of Support
This time of year, as we think about military families and their sacrifices, it’s also worth considering ways to support them, especially those who may be alone for the holidays. Many military spouses know the small, meaningful ways to show we care. Sometimes, a thoughtful “deployment survival kit” or a small Christmas gift for those separated by miles can make all the difference.
Military wives, particularly those married to servicemen in the Army or Royal Navy, often understand that gifts can truly bring comfort—a nice coffee cup, a personalised keepsake, a photo book of family memories, or even a small engraved piece that represents their partner’s service. These gestures of connection, no matter how small, bring a bit of warmth to those long days and quiet evenings.
Looking Back on the Journey
For Carole, reflecting on those early years was both nostalgic and bittersweet. When Phil finally left the service, he had missed much of their children’s first five years. Those of us who have shared similar experiences know the mixed emotions that come with this lifestyle. The pride, the challenges, and the enduring hope that their loved ones will return safely.
These reflections are particularly resonant as we approach Remembrance Day—a day not only for honouring those who served, but also those who held down the home front, kept the children calm, managed the moves, and waited in quiet resilience. The military life isn’t just about deployments; it’s about adapting to each change, creating stability, and supporting one another through the highs and lows.
If you're looking for thoughtful military gifts this season, explore our selection of personalised keepsakes, and gifts for military families in our shop. Whether it’s a special token for a military wife, or simply a gesture to show you care, our items are made to bring comfort and connection.
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